15.02.2007 ~ 300... 'SPARTANS - TO DEATH OR GLORY'
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Just over the horizon lurks the cinematic rendering of a stylised illustrated retelling of an older cinematic representation of a battle that occurred during the Persian wars. 300, a movie based on the series of five comics that loosely retold 1962's motion picture 'The 300 Spartans', which in turn was based on the legend of 480BC's battle of Thermopylae.
300 bare asses in the air
Yep - another movie about muscled men in short skirts brandishing pointy sticks and beating the shit out of one another. It falls into the same mold as Brad Pitt's cringe worthy Troy and Colin Farrell's [insert expletive here] Alexander. Excited yet? You should be... 300 is set to vivify this flagging genre.
Holding the line: 300 vs. 1,000,000
While I can't admit to queueing up in 1962 to see 'The 300 Spartans', I can't help but get all giggly about another of Frank Millers properties making it to the big screen. Robert Rodriguez helmed Miller's 'Sin City' to spectacular effect and this time Zack Snyder ('Dawn of the Dead' ) gets to fill the driving seat.
The battle depicts a rear guard action by 300 Spartans backed by 700 Thespian troops who hold the Persian advance further into Greece at a strategic pass, buying time for the retreating Greek army. Click here to see a rough location of the battle of Thermopylae, curious that the E75 motorway lies near the scene today!
Promising a faithful recreation of the comic (some claim shot-for-shot!), we can expect plenty of Miller's usual eye watering framing, a large dose of gore, scantily clad actors and scenery (please note: movies typically have actors and scenery. Some expand this with a sprinkling of dialogue. Some even go whole hog and include a plot. Not many, but some...)
Cribs have surfaced bemoaning the fact the players aren't dressed for the occasion as they would have been in the period (copper armour clad Spartans vs. wood/leather clad Persians) and note the absence of the 700 Thespian soldiers who threw their lot in with the Spartans ... but it's better to just recall it's a cinematic recreation of a graphic novel, snuggle into your hot water bottle and rock gently back and forth - it'll make you feel better.
Titanic Ending?
The legend of the battle is well known. The Spartans fight the good fight until a flanking action by the Persians (using information gleaned from a Greek traitor) leads to a last stand of the finest traditions. Ultimately their efforts leads to a decisive naval battle in which the Greek are victorious. We'll just have to wait and see how this will pan out on-screen ...
300 Trailers
I wonder if they'll include the legendary Spartan 'pre-battle' hair brushing...300 hits the screen March 9th 2007
Update: Where are all the good guns gone?
Red faced update to my musings on the state of Galactica's big guns...